I think we all know that love is a choice. I have heard it, read it, and even experienced it many times throughout this engagement season. Love is not something we are naturally inclined to do, but we do it by the grace of God -- all glory to Him, because He loved us first and demonstrated His love in a way we never could. Love is more than just a feeling... it's an action, it's a belief, and it's the very essence of God Himself. I believe that going into our marriage knowing where our love for each other comes from will make a huge impact in the growth of our relationship.
However, there is certainly a difference in choosing to love and falling in love, because falling in love isn't much of a choice!
In the midst of all the wedding planning and moving preparation I've had some time to reflect on my relationship with Daniel: the past, present, and exciting new future. As we have begun talking about and writing out our vows for one another, I have had moments where I thought, "Can I remember the moment when I fell in love with Daniel?" I clearly remember the first time he told me he loved me, and the first time I told him back (not on the same occasion, by the way). But do I remember the moment when I really, truly fell in love with the man I am marrying in 16 days? **ONLY 16 DAYS!!** Being a little nostalgic lately, it wasn't hard for me to dig back into that "memories to keep forever" part of my brain, and I'm pretty certain I've pinpointed the exact moment in which I really fell in love with D. Don't get me wrong, it was certainly a process and continues to be, because I find myself falling more in love daily. But I wanted to share this one particular moment where things clicked for me. So here it is.. whoever you are reading out there.
Falling in love with Daniel:
We had been talking/dating for only a few months, and at this point he had already expressed his love for me. His words were honest and true, coming from the depths of his heart, when he first told me. But I wanted to be fully convicted and sure of my love for him before I said the words, and he respected that. We spent our first Christmas as a couple apart from each other, but when we were reunited he was bursting at the seams for me to open my Christmas gift from him. I can still remember everything he gave me that Christmas: a super cute purple scarf, some sweet smelling lotion, a CD with some of our favorite songs, and a poem he wrote for me. I read the poem last... and that's when I knew. And it was around that time that I first told him of my love for him. :) Kee! Read the poem for yourself and see if YOU don't fall in love with him!! (But please don't. He's taken!)
A Summer Night In Haiti, by Walter Daniel Jackson
On rocky road and dusty trail we walked into the night
under the moon and starry sky, and guided by its light.
We walked along, just barely seen, on Haiti's dusty way.
I can't think of a better way to end a summer's day.
The day was hot and summer's heat had shined upon us true.
The day was filled with loving kids, love shown them through and through.
All that was done in Jesus' name and for His Kingdom come;
We know where all that Love for them is ultimately from.
But as we walked, two people there, as missionary guides
we walked and talked and made our way with joy into the night.
we walked and talked and made our way with joy into the night.
The crows were there, and foxes too; we sang of them in song.
I thought of me without you then, and then I sang along.
The Mickey tree we sat beneath gave shade to us and humor;
Not even rain could make us stop or leave there any sooner.
You told me of your dear sisters, you told me of your mom,
you told me as we sat nearby to water deep and calm.
One more thing we did back then I'd like to share in verse;
beginning with our first night out our joys were so diverse.
And though I cannot hardly tell all that we did together,
there's one more thing I'd like to say before I end this letter.
We shared our deepest thoughts of God, our Lord and dearest Friend.
He works all things in perfect good, in ways we don't intend.
Did I know then as we walked near how Haiti's trip would end?
Perhaps I knew in back of mind you'd be my morethanfriend.
With this I'll end my brief account, and rhyming letter, too:
Merry Christmas, my dear, and half-birthday.
Rebecca, I love you.
I know that love is a choice, and that sometimes it's easier than others. But, in the future, if there are times when choosing to love gets hard, I believe I will always be able to come back to this beautifully written poem and fall in love with Mr. Daniel more and more. :)
Daniel,
Thank you for the special words you speak into my life. Can't wait to marry you.
Love always, Bec
